Generation Shift

Birthdays are always a time of reflection. A time to look back over our years and see how we have changed and society has evolved over the years. In a few days I will celebrate my 42nd birthday and as I looked back over the four decades of life, I realized that I lived the first half of my life without the internet and the second half with the internet.

The internet itself just entered its 40's as well. Few were paying attention back on Sept. 2, 1969, when about 20 people gathered at the University of California, Los Angeles, to watch as two bulky computers passed meaningless test data through a 15-foot gray cable. That was the beginning of the fledgling Arpanet network. Stanford Research Institute joined a month later, and UC Santa Barbara and the University of Utah did by year's end.

The 1970s brought e-mail and the TCP/IP communications protocols, which allowed multiple networks to connect - and formed the Internet. The '80s gave birth to an addressing system with suffixes like ".com" and ".org" in widespread use today.

The Internet didn't become a household word until the '90s, though, after a British physicist, Tim Berners-Lee, invented the Web, a subset of the Internet that makes it easier to link resources across disparate locations. Meanwhile, service providers like America Online connected millions of people for the first time.

The internet has definitely changed not only how we access information but it has also dramatically changed our definition of friendships and community. The internet generation has also brought forth new courtesies of social interaction, habits, and etiquette. Today the world Internet population has surpassed 1.5 billion. (FYI -China's Internet population of 250 million, recently surpassed the United States as the world's largest.)

My father passed away before the rise of the internet, never knowing the dramatic changes it would bring in the workplace or at home. I have friends that are finishing college who can't imagine life without the internet and the ability to quickly access the world. Then there is me and my generation - Generation Shift - that has bridged both grnrtations.

Aside from the speed and scope of information that the internet places at our fingertips - the most significant impact has been on inter-personal relationships, friendships, and our definition of community.

In the first half of my life, the social circle for my parents and myself, was defined by geography and consisted of the people who lived in the neighborhood or with whom I went to school. Those were the days of neighbors getting together for BBQs or afternoon coffee; a time when every street had a "Gladys Crabtree" who always knew all the gossip and was quick to spread the word.

Friendships in those non-internet days were all about spending time face to face talking or hanging out. I remember in high school having one or two really close friends with whom I would spend a couple hours each night talking on the phone that hung on the wall in the kitchen. Meeting new friends almost always began with a personal introduction from another friend. And mom always knew the parents of the friends - the people to call when you stayed out past curfew with your buddies.

Today my social circle doesn't really include anyone that lives within my geographic neighborhood. The internet means I am more likely to talk with a friend from California more regularly than I do the guy living next door. The number of "friends" either on Facebook or my buddy lists number in the hundreds and keeping in touch with them is as easy as a text, tweet or instant message, and instead of that one long phone call from my high school days, its non uncommon to be engaged in multiple in depth chats at once via the internet.

Not too long ago my 87 year old mother, in a tone of concern, asked - "You don't ever meet people from the computer (internet), do you? " I'm sure my answer placated her concern, but I sat and wondered who I hadn't met or cultivated a friendship with in the last ten years that didn't involve the internet.

There are some habits and traits that remain for me from those non internet days. Things that shape my perception of internet relationships, things that only a member of Generation Shift probably understand.

I cringe when someone introduces me as "Jim from Facebook" or some other internet geography - "no, Jim is from Nashville we met via Facebook" is my usual retort. I am also hesitant to use the word "friend" to describe someone that I only know from on-line, and haven't met in the flesh. I'm also not likely to refer to someone as a screen name such as BadBoyTex or ScoobyDoo222 - first and last names are still preferred on my part.

The biggest shift that I still struggle with in the internet generation is with regards to dating. I remember when you went on dates to get to know about someone and explore your common interests. These days you have probably chatted with someone at length on line before you even go on a date. You probably have covered the major topics of conversation and what you didn't discuss you may have discovered by Googling the person a la "background check" before the first time you come eye to eye.